Darkness...

One of my Spiritual Healers, during a session years ago, told me that she learned to "embrace and celebrate" her darkness. I let her know that I found that hard to do. I inherited my Father's incendiary temper. Often it takes so much aforethought, and coping strategies to keep it at bay. 

When I am stressed, which I have been lately, over a multitude of issues and a seemingly non-stop barrage of challenges that seem never-ending, it doesn't take much to ignite my imu. My oven. Once lit, it wants to rage and incinerate and destroy everything in its all consuming radius. 

I have raged on the road, even shocking to me, and yes, in front of my family.  I can hold grudges for years. I can savor and plot revenge for years with the best of them. I am not proud of any of this. I have hit and broken things in the house, even punching a table and breaking my hand. I still have the protruding bone in my hand which serves as a stark reminder to me to never allow myself to go there ever again. For it may turn out to be a place from which I will never return. 

Thus I found it hard to understand my Spiritual Healer.

But slowly I am beginning to understand. The Darkness is an integral part of who I am. I refuse to deny it. I refuse to hide it. I refuse to minimize it in some kind of illusory facade. But in acknowledging this Darkness of my Being, I realize that each day, each moment, I make decisions.

Do I pretend all is well and that fortunately Love and Light Rule my World? Or do I try my hardest and best to ensure that, through daily Choices, through Words, through Actions, through Thoughts, Love and Light Absolutely Rule my World. 

That is the True Power of Understanding my Darkness. I Shall Strive to never wantonly submit to it. In fact, I will seek to Harness it for the Highest and Greatest Good.

In the dying words of the Great Chiefess, Manono, as she stood over the slain body of her husband, Chief Kekuaokalani, "Mālama Kō Aloha." 

"Keep your Love..."