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Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Love...


Hāloanakalaukapalili gently cradles and protects...
The Sacred Life Giving Waters of Kāne...
Not for his Life...
But for All of Ours...

Healing...


There is more Healing...
And more Soul Cleansing...
Contained in a single Fallen Tear...
Of Pure Love and Forgiveness...
Than in all of the Oceans...
Of the World...

Monday, June 29, 2015

Hō'ike Practice...




Reverence...


Hula...


Hula...


Chocolate...


Melted chocolate ready for dipping whatever your Heart desires...

Awash...


Sunday, June 28, 2015

A Wondrous Love...


Connoisseur...


Be a Connoisseur of the Finer Things in Life...

Nostalgic...


Spirited...


Kū i ka Pono...


Stand up for Righteousness...

'Onipa'a...


Steadfast...

Hula at Kapalua...




Saturday, June 27, 2015

He Malu Ka Nohona....


Life is Peaceful...

Healing Serenity...


Gratitude...


The Blade of Grass...
Does not Mourn...
Nor Grieve or Lament...
Nor Complain...
About the first signs of Decay...
And eventual Death...
It is Humbly Grateful...
For the Gentle Reminder...
To make the Most...
Of Each and Every...
Beautiful Precious Remaining Day...

Hula...


Friday, June 26, 2015

Ao...


Enlightened...

'Onipa'a...


Behold the Awesome Power and Mana of Pono...
'Onipa'a...

Hōʻailona...


On my recent trip to Hawai'i Island to start cleaning up my parent's home in Volcano, I was hoping to get a lot of the cleaning of the home and yard done early enough to go over to the Mauna Loa road above Hawai'i Volcanoes National Park and spend some much needed time of solitude and reflection in the forest with my camera. I really was hoping to see the two 'Io, or Hawaiian Hawks that appeared the last time I ventured there. It was such a powerful and timely Hōʻailona...not one 'Io, but two, and the younger one flew onto a tree branch about twelve feet in front of me and sat there screeching and looking around. Every time she looked directly at me, chicken skin erupted and I tried to photograph her looking through my camera viewfinder with tear-blurred vision. When I saw her one eye was injured, I immediately knew the connection. Kamaka'eha. Our Beautiful Queen Lili'uokalani. I will never forget it. 

On this trip, I ended up so busy and so exhausted, as during the drive up to Volcano from Hilo, I experienced a long bout of what I suspect is angina pectoris as my chest was heavy and burning with shooting pain. I think it was the stress of still dealing with the aftermath of the relatively recent death of both of my parents and beloved sister. I had another episode at one point during the day in the home as well.  I openly and loudly conversed with my Mother, Father and Sister, as if they were in the home right next to me as I tried to deal with an overwhelming amount of personal and family ephemera and belongings. It took me so long because each photograph I picked up, each letter, each document, even souvenirs, mementos, curios, and seemingly mundane thing elicited strong memories and I held them and pondered their value in saving or discarding. 

It seemed like an overwhelming task and I often had to sit down and rest because so many emotions filled me. So many decisions to make. On top of that, many things of sentimental value were missing from the home apparently stolen during my Father's Dementia and unauthorized entry into the home by people will ill-intent to take advantage. I had to change the locks because I had no idea how many people had keys because my Father's new wife let people come into the home indiscriminately and help themselves to family things as they had no value to her and my Father couldn't speak. It really made me upset. 

I stopped by the Volcano Store to buy a drink and saw a flyer posted for a reward for someone who shot an 'Io in Volcano Village. The bird survived but will never fly again. It made me mad and sad at the same time. I had never seen an 'Io in Volcano Village in thirty years of going back and forth to my parent's home although others probably have. What a Blessing, and to have someone shoot it down.

I went back to the house and finished cutting grass and weeds with an electric weed-whacker, and every time I ventured too far, the cord would pull tight and I couldn't reach the areas I needed to. So I kept attaching extension cord to extension cord to allow me cover the whole yard and driveway. I was exhausted after and realized that I needed to take a shower, and head down to Hilo to catch my flight home. There was no time or energy to visit the Mauna Loa Road forest with futile hope to see my 'Io again. I knew it was a slim chance to absolutely none given the probability not in my favor.

Right when I was about to enter the garage to go upstairs, tired, sweaty, covered in grass clippings, I heard a loud screeching, and looked up, and to my amazement, not one, but two 'Io came soaring over my neighbor's home, and landed in a tree right on the street in front of our home. My heart pounded with excitement and disbelief. I could feel tears welling up in my eyes as I bolted up the stairs in the home to find my camera. I quickly switched lenses and ran up another flight of stairs and out onto the highest deck. I strained to look through the trees towards the tree where I saw them land. Looking for any signs of movement. Nothing. I sat down quietly in the chair on the deck and listened intently. Nothing. I thought they probably flew off while I was in the house climbing stairs and looking for my camera. I sat there in quiet reflection. Humbly grateful for such a Beautiful and Meaningful Hōʻailona. I felt my parents. A sign of encouragement. That I was doing the right thing despite so many lingering doubts and guilt. It was an affirmation for me.  To never stop believing in the Magic of this Beautiful World. To know the Unseen. To see my parents finally free of so much pain and disappointment in this Life. To Soar with Each Other. Still madly in Love.

And just as I was about to go inside the house to take my shower and head down the hill, I saw this Beautiful Majestic 'Io quietly and quickly soar from one of the tall trees in the front yard where he must have sat unnoticed to my prying eyes. And in the only open space and quick moment, I lifted my camera and took one photo before he disappeared. I was so sure I didn't capture him because he was so fast through the tree canopy and my camera was more likely to have focused on one of the many swaying tree branches than a bird flying through the trees. 

I excitedly looked at the camera viewfinder of my one photo, and zoomed in to see the 'Io in focus. It wasn't my imagination. I was moved to tears again in humble gratitude. The World is absolutely filled with Blessings and Gifts. If we only close our eyes, and open our Hearts...

Thursday, June 25, 2015

Love, Humility and Gratitude...

Wednesday, June 24, 2015

Healing...


I went offline for a couple of days as I had to focus on family matters and my health. I still am dealing with the aftermath of my Father's passing with so many loose ends to take care of, on top of my own kuleana with home and work. To be honest, it was liberating being off of Facebook, even for only a few days. A couple of weeks ago, at work, I experienced a frightening episode of chest pain. It was a burning in the chest, with a heavy and tight feeling, neck and back muscles cramping, pain shooting down my arms and hands. I felt very weak and immediately went into prayer. I was thinking a heart-attack, and getting ready to dial 911 on my cell-phone. It seemed to let up after about three of the longest minutes of my recent Life. 

The other thought that came into my mind, was a Spiritual attack. I have been told repeatedly by gifted friends, that I leave myself far too open. I actually was first told this over ten years ago. One friend told me to armor my na'au, my waist, Spiritually to protect myself. Another gifted healer friend of mine told me to set boundaries around myself at arm's length and not let people in. I have been repeatedly "whacked" off and on for over twenty years now dealing with Native Hawaiian burials and a host of intense cultural issues of highly sensitive and emotive subjects. I have always just been my open self, exposing my na'au to the World, trusting in the protection of my God, His Angels, my ancestors, 'aumakua and a host of Spiritual Beings, alive and dead. 

However, I have had at least 12 episodes of this Heart issue in the past eight days. Some mild, and some intense, to the point of feeling such a overwhelming feeling of dread and gloom, like it would be my last few breaths in this Life. My doctor gave me an EKG and my Heart doesn't show signs of damage as far as beating. I am scheduled to see a cardiologist next week to run a battery of tests. I suspect it may be Angina Pectoris caused my a reduced blood flow to the Heart. My friends are checking on the Spiritual connections and messages for me while I pursue the battery of physical tests.  I always remember my Father telling me about a family member who climbed a ladder and had a heart attack. He didn't even make it to age 40. My father's father, my grand-father, died on the operating table during heart surgery. These things crossed my mind. 

The episodes seem connected to stress so I am trying to reduce my levels which is very difficult in the job I have dealing with every imaginable issue and injustice with the Hawaiian people and a host of Spiritual issues prevalent in many Hawaiian 'ohana. The last thing I need now is to end up back in the ICU, in a coma and on Life-Support. Fortunately, my pancreas is functioning good, as that was my first concern. I hope to rule out Spiritual attacks because they tend to be messy. 

I'm not talking about someone sitting over a kapu 'ahi kuni'anā'anā stone bowl burning something of mine, praying me to death. Many attacks are unintentional, when someone with Mana in their words, utters out of resentment, jealousy, fear or a multitude of reasons, hana 'ino against you. Even some strong thoughts can manifest themselves into real harm to others. That is why I am very careful with my own choice of words and thoughts. I have witnessed people struck dead over powerful words in my Lifetime. 

If it is determined that I have aka cords attached to people who wish me harm, the ego always wants to send it back for retribution. But this is not how I was taught. The healers release the cords, and send them back with Love, Light and Forgiveness. When you send back with anger and intent to hurt, you lose a vital part of your own Healing gifts. I was taught this by a well-known kahuna lā'au lapa'au. You are either a healer or a destroyer. You can't dabble in both. I have a feeling that in at least one of my past Lives, I was a destroyer. Egomaniacal merciless slaughter. I don't want to be sent back for another Life and more lessons. I want to learn my Soul's lessons this time around. I have much kuleana to take care of before I depart from this Realm.  Several thousand iwi kupuna still sitting in boxes after half a century need to go back into the ground and that is my priority right now, among other kuleana.  I have been Blessed to take care of many things already with a sense of accomplishment, but there is much more to do.

As I arrived in Hilo yesterday morning, my flight had many kānaka ki'ai Mauna onboard. It was reinvigorating for my Spirit to connect with them knowing they were headed up to the Mauna. At the same time, I felt sad that I wasn't headed up there with them. On the return flight, late at night, back to O'ahu, the plane I boarded equally had a host of kānaka kia'i Mauna arriving for the Mauna. It was so precious and uplifting to see them and embrace but again, the same feeling overcame me of not being directly on the frontline. What we individually do, wherever we are, to support the protection of this amazing wahi kapu, is up to us. Send Love, Light, Prayers, Healing and Forgiveness. Anytime. Anywhere. Your words and thoughts will truly manifest in amazing and powerful ways. For now, I have to focus on my own kuleana and support the movement, like many, in little and large ways from afar. Their are larger battles looming in the foreseeable future, and the Mauna is just the beginning for us. We need to mālama each other as it will take its toll on many. There is no turning back now.

A Molokai kupuna once said decades ago, that our Lāhui will not rise until we return all of the iwi back to rest in the 'āina. Their Mana is needed now more than ever. I mahalo the kānaka kia'i Mauna for helping to keep those buried on the Mauna protected and in the ground. The Spiritual battles are truly escalating, and I need to armor myself. I need to Heal myself and focus on my family. There is no Lāhui without the 'ohana. I need to focus on my Healing first. When I finally go, I want to go knowing I did everything I could to make this World a more Beautiful, Loving, Kind and Forgiving place with a Bright Future for Earth and her 'ohana. True and pure Aloha Kekahi i Kekahi. Love for Each Other. Finally to greet my Mother and Father, sister, grandparents, all of my ancestors and 'ohana in the Spiritual Realm, to embrace Henry Opukaha'ia, our Beloved Queen Lili'uokalani, Ke Ali'i Pauahi, Princess Ruth, Kamehameha himself, and Keawe-Ka'iana-a-'Ahu'ula, and so many others, and let the tears freely flow in our embrace. Kulukuluwaimaka. A good and industrious Life indeed. Then I can rest. Finally. Rest...

Hoʻāla...


To Awaken...

Monday, June 22, 2015

Father...


Every Day is Father's Day...

Love...


No matter what happened Before...
No matter what will happen after I am Gone...
That we held each Other...
For a Beautiful Ephemeral Moment...
In Precious Love...
Will Sustain my Heart...
For an Eternity...

Nahenahe...


Hula at Kapalua...











Hula...



Remembrance...



I am very thankful to my beautiful photographer brother Blaine for capturing these memories in January of 2009 when my two sons and I joined hundreds of other Native Hawaiians and supporters in a March down Kalakaua Avenue in Waikīkī. It was my boys' first march and I gave them their kīhei and pū and told them to follow my lead. I didn't realize at the time how terrifying it must have been for them in all the excitement, emotion, chanting and chaos, to be helping to lead the march. I was, and remain, so proud of them. When I was on my deathbed in the ICU at Queen's in 2012, Blaine dropped off a framed photo of my boys and I on Kalakaua Avenue to cheer me up and remind me that I had reasons to live. What a Beautiful Friend. Mahalo Ke Akua...

Sunday, June 21, 2015

La'a...


Grace Under Pressure...


Hawaiian Grace and Beauty...


Blessings...





I thought about all the things in the past that I gave to my Father. As far as material things...not very much I'm afraid to say. I was even horrible at filling out holiday cards. The one thing that remained constant throughout our Lives, however, is that I always gave him my Love and Respect. There were things that I truly wish had occurred differently at times, but such are the strains and trials that forge the Human Spirit into valuable lessons for our Souls. 

He gave so much to his Country, after 31 years of service in the United States Marine Corps and tours in Vietnam. Towards the end, he felt let down my his Country, for losing so many values that he grew up believing in. He fought corruption at the highest levels of the United States and sought Justice in a one-man, and one-son, crusade that stole over a decade and a half from the quality of his Life and that of my Mothers. He yearned for the recognition of his Honor and Character in the End. His two Meritorious Service Medals as a Lieutenant Colonel in the United States Marine Corps, now awash in the broken fragments of his memory and decreased functioning as a victim of merciless Dementia.

Despite the seemingly overwhelming obstacles in the last few years of his Life, including my 10,000 mile roundtrip to rescue and retrieve him, we managed to give each other the precious gift of unconditional Love and Healing Laughter. It truly can salve the most broken of Hearts. I am humbled to tears that with the help of such Beautiful Souls and Friends, like Eda and Walt Kaneakua, and with the Loving Support of so many Friends and Family, including my FB 'ohana, that we were able to give my Father, and my Mother as well, as a career military officer's wife, the appropriate Military Honors, and a most Beautiful Final Resting Place at the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific at Punchbowl, to kanu, or bury them, in the ground, overlooking many important wahi pana of our lives. Makakilo, Camp Smith, Tripler Hospital, Kamehameha Schools, Mauna 'Ala, and so many others.

Still dealing with my own Health issues, and overwhelming kuleana and stress, everything was touch and go until the very last day before the planned reinterment and a ground plot became available. I had to seize the moment to take care of this kuleana and promise to my parents. Even some close 'ohana missed the event because I didn't communicate effectively in the ever-changing scenario. For that, I am so truly sorry and ask for forgiveness.


I am awaiting the installation of their engraved marker. Having a choice of many, many engravings to look at it, one became quickly apparent. Knowing that a rare Love that could withstand the ravages of time, and salvage the Heartaches of Human Frailty, should be Honored, I chose, "Together Forever." I know the thought of being separated from each other would be too much for two enraptured Hearts to bear. Love you Mother and Father. Happy Father's Day to All...